Okay, so. I know my last post I said things have been disastrous, and as true as that's been, I've been doing pretty decently. I mean - obviously, I am struggling, but at the end of the day I'm not self harming, I'm not suicidal, I'm not harming my children, I am not cheating on my husband (hiding and lying to him), I am decently stable through all this shit. I'm actually really proud of myself. The past few years have been hell. Like, literally hell for me. I'm sure things could be worse, they could always be worse. I still have my babies, I have my family, I have amazing friends who I love and that love me, I have a roof over my head and food in my stomach (and my babies), and I'm dealing.
That doesn't mean anything has been easy - especially emotionally and psychologically. I battle with thoughts of self harm, I struggle with always making the choices I want to make, and I'm overwhelmed a lot of the time. BUT I am getting as much help as I can and giving myself as much grace as I can. I've started a new med a few weeks ago but I stopped because I was getting night sweats so I am starting a couple new meds tonight that will hopefully help. I'm addressing my depression and my sensory overload with the meds and hoping they will help those issues out. I'm doing what I can.
I'm really proud of all my work and I'm going to keep at it.
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