Engaged to an angel

I fixed things with Justin. He came home - he had one of his friends bring him home. At first I wouldn't talk to him at all but I really upset him when I threw his pillow on the ground. He started yelling which was super out of character for him. It finally triggered me to break my silence.
I was finally able to tell him how I felt, what I was going through, and why I felt the way I did. He then hugged me, loved me, and understood me. And he apologized. He is truly an amazing man.

I oftentimes feel as if I don't deserve him at all. But one thing I know for sure is that he makes me happy and I love him so much. He means a lot to me - so much I couldn't put it into words. He is always there for me, loving me, caring for me, understanding, and just amazing. I don't think I could ask for a better guy than him.

Today I went to Johnson & Wales University to speak with the financial adviser in charge. I finished handing in all the paperwork that they needed in order to prepare my financial aid for this term. I then told her about my struggle to afford books. She said she doesn't usually do anything to help but since I wouldn't be able to attend unless I can afford books she was giving me a small grant to help pay for them. She told me to go in during the first week of school and ask for the voucher and then take it to the bookstore and get the books I need. It's almost like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

I can't believe soon I will be a student again. An actual college student studying counseling psychology and aiming for my Masters degree in Psychology Sciences. It's crazy. I am so excited to earn this degree. I'm so happy to be doing this for myself and for my family.

Still no call back for the job Justin applied to. I feel as if I really shouldn't get my hopes up. It was a nice thought for me to imagine though. Him getting the job, finally being able to get our own place, our own apartment. Finally being able to afford our family. Not having to worry about birthdays and holidays for our children. But yeah, let's not get ahead of ourselves, right? It's been a week and he hasn't even gotten a call for an interview.

Not much else going on yet. Hm..

Last night I was upset. I was upset because I wanted to spend some time with Justin. I wanted it to be just him and I. I wanted to cuddle up to him and breathe him in. I kept trying to put Noel in Lailah's bed. Which I've done before and he was fine. But he kept waking up. Then I got upset enough that I couldn't fall asleep. I didn't get to sleep until past 4am. Thankfully Justin understood and he got Lailah ready this morning for her Memere and camp then he took Noel for me for a bit. So I got to sleep a bit more than I would have.  I'm engaged to an angel.