Usually my head doesn't stop racing multiple thought trains, I feel depressed, defeated, anxious, and I just want to complain about everything all the time - but lately, I haven't.
Since I've quit work I've been feeling so much more calm. I haven't been yelling at my children - actually, we've been connecting a lot more. Lailah and I have been cuddling and talking often about deep subjects and Noel and I have been playing with his toys more often. I'm still not where I want to be - I still struggle with my internet addiction but I am working on it.
I'm excited for summer to be approaching because we will be able to spend time at the park or beaches etc. I will be able to spend more time with my children outside of the house making memories and bonding with them as people.
I don't feel as foggy and emotionally constipated as I have in the past... and that feels so refreshing.
Although, now that I don't feel like I'm suffering from my own problems I feel like I'm focusing too much on all the other terrible things in the world and I hate that there is SO much that I can not change. It feels awful. :/
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