Why does this keep me sane?

Why does this keep me going? Why does it keep me sane?
I'm not completely sad anymore. I get depressed still but I can cope better.
This Mark thing. Why?

Lailah shows me love, why isn't that enough? Why do I feel  need this, more?
I love being with Mark. Cuddling, watchin movies, kissing, holding hands, sex, all of it. Why does he have me over every night even though he has work at 7am? Why does he make the efford to comfort me when I'm upset? Why is he still there when I push him away?
        I love it. I crave it. I want it.